As you can see, I am a real family guy. I am the first chief justice of the United States in at least a century to be raising small children, so I know a thing or two about relationships and starting a family.

Rule number one: do not get married until you are in your 40s. The law is too important to worry about relationships until then. For example, if you are practicing in Los Angeles, you may be tempted to meet women at the club or at the beach. You may be tempted to fly them in for casual "visits" and drive them around in your fancy "acura." Do not fall into this trap. Your law firm needs your work and you need those 15 hour work days for 20+ years to prepare you for family life. I got married in my 40s in 1996 and it was the best decision in my life.

Rule number two: adopt. If you get married past the age of 25, you obviously have issues and it is best if you do not pass those on to subsequent generations, so make sure to adopt. I adopted and it makes the 10 minutes a week I spend with my children worthwhile, since they will not grow up to be like me.

Rule number three: make sure your kids go to UNLV law school.